The universe is a masterpiece. It consists of billions of individual tiny dots which are purposely placed together to create a unique work of art. No dot is insignifictant; each one is as vital as another in painting the universe.
Every person in the universe is their own work of art. We are a work in progress; and every person, experience, memory and dream dot the canvas of our lives. Regardless of its shape, size, or color, each dot is there for a reason. They may seem like mere specks which are there for no apparent rhyme or reason, or they may be vivid stars, forming a very evident constellation.
Some people live their lives with no real purpose. They scatter from one dot to the next with no plan or goal. As I journey through life, my quest for its reason has led me to connect its dots in order to find my purpose. Although I’ve always had faith that eventually I would see the masterpiece, there were times when my life was a puzzle, much like a maze. A maze must be elevated in order to keep you from bouncing off its walls like a pinball machine. Our thought processes must also be elevated so that our star may shine and become a vital part of the constellation we leave behind.
Our memories are the dots of our past, and we lose our recall of them as they fade with time. Yet, these memories all produce the slide show of our lives. Thus far, the 28 years I have spent on earth have yielded 200 powerful memories. Since I do not have the capacity to vividly store many more, I am releasing those memories to make room for more.
My first one hundred memories, starting when I was three, were that of despair. My parents had been abused as children, and they despised the lifestyle in which they were raised. Unfortunately, they did not realize they were repeating the cycle and were abusive, as well. My earliest memories are of witnessing and later being the victim of their abuse.
Although I was the youngest of six children, I was five years younger than my closest sibling. Therefore, I was frequently alone. At a young age, I developed a sense of survival. Later, I learned that I had a powerful gift for auditory processing. I was able to interpret pitch and tone; and I stored sounds and words in my mind’s memory bank, withdrawing them as needed for my survival.
I have an older brother named Brian. His name is tonally the same as mine, Ryan. When my father became angry, I quickly learned how to determine which one of us was the focus of his anger before he got very close. In order to escape my father’s punishments, I learned to set crafty traps to steer his anger toward Brian. As a young boy, I had developed a rare identity and set of skills uncommon for a child my age.
It also became clear that I was different from my peers. A rebel in my youth, I was once considered the most dangerous juvenile in our county. Like Huck Finn, I found I could receive attention from my negative actions. I quickly learned the power of fear, so I used that power to stand out from the crowd. Fear was my double-edged sword. My parents used fear to suppress me, and in turn, I used fear to gain power over others.
By the age of 16, I was aware that these actions worked and could give me whatever I wanted. I was an overachiever in sports by this time; unfortunately, the rules of society required that I played those games in jail. My salvation actually came in the form of a meeting with a mentor, which was arranged by my mother. He had a different presence than most men I’d known; he had a non-threatening nature with a hint of femininity and refinement.
Later, my mentor rescued me and my mother. We moved from a rat-infested home in a high-crime neighborhood to his castle on an island, with exotic birds and a lake jumping with fish below my bedroom window. This peaceful and joyous environment brought me much pleasure. Elated, I now knew what I wanted in life, and developed a desire to learn everything I could in order to achieve a life rich with success.
My first hundred memories were now behind me, and I was free to create the second hundred. Traits which were previously dormant were awakened, and I developed ambition and a desire for accomplishment. Having only completed 9th grade, I pursued a rigorous course of study, completing high school within one year while simultaneously attending college. I spent the next two years with the curiosity of an infant, soaking up everything I could learn.
The next hundred memories read like a story tale. I surrounded myself with great thinkers and leaders. As their student, I learned what made them unique. My gift to them was the satisfaction they derived from contributing to others. In turn, they presented me with the gift of their knowledge and experience.
Not afraid to ask for help, I persuaded a major investor to fund my cause. As his protégé, this man challenged me and left me with no choice but to succeed. With his support and the wind at my back, I braved new territories. The lessons I learned from my mentors were invaluable to me, especially during times when success was not certain.
Driven toward my goal, I persistently moved forward with a “nothing can stop me now” attitude. With a clear mind and purpose, I drove on toward my master plan. It wasn’t always easy, for I was often within a few short steps of major disaster or massive success. I persevered, learning that success requires determination and faith.
Although I wasn’t aware of it for some time, ambition had been hibernating within me my whole life. Awakening that ambition gave me a new perspective on life. It gave me the opportunity to have experiences and create wonderful memories which few people are privileged to know. Those memories and experiences have become the dots on my canvas, and I tell my story to show you how those dots connect to paint my picture.
The process of connecting our dots is designed to provide us with faith in our future. I share my memories not to impress you, but rather to impress upon you that life is merely a summary of the actions we take, the people we know, and the behaviors we learn. As you read this, you have become connected to me either by observing my dots or becoming one of them. Embrace the process as I have, and you, too, will live a life of awe.